Rabid Puppies Strike Back!

I don’t have any works of my own up for a Hugo this year, but I urge all fans of non-Morlock science fiction to bestir themselves and vote.

The Evil Legion of Evil Authors has declared war on the Morlocks. Our Dark Lord, Vox Day of the Infinite Evil, helpfully posts his voting preferences.

Question: Must I vote exactly as the Dark Lord indicates?

Answer: Participation is voluntary, unless you have sold your soul and lost all capacity for free will by the painful implantation of a cybernetic brain-consumption cortex-worm (which, of course, as Grand Inquisitor, I wholly recommend).

Pre-formatted forms for soul-selling are available on sublevel 3 of the volcano island base of Darkstormhold, the office of Metaphysical Absorption and Abnegation next to the Haunted Chapel.

Merely approach the portal and speak into the Discontinuity in a loud, clear voice.

Avoid colloquial expressions, ambiguity, rhetorical questions, cant. Such things enrage the Otherlings. Use the sterilized meat cleaver if your terms require somatic payment.

Do not touch any physical objects seen to emerge from the Discontinuity! These are aportations, and qualified personnel will deal with them.

The macroscopic life forms will reply through the vocal cords of the Saracen’s Head mounted above the window.  Speak the words of the binding written in ebon on the plaque, and insert your head in the unit.

The process is painless for us, and the side effects are permanent and highly disquieting.

Or, for your convenience, you could simply vote in the Hugo Awards with the Rabid Puppies. The long term effects on this area of spacetime are the same.

For myself, I will be voting in perfect lockstep with the Dark Lord, as this is the rational response to the ghastly condition to which the Puppy Kickers brought the once-respected Hugos last year.

So, yes, I will also be voting for Chuck Tingle and My Little Ponies. His is a name worthy of what this award has become.

My second reason for so voting is that if I attempt counter-regulationary thought, the cortex-worm clamps energetically on my Lobe of Volitional Excruciation, inducing vehement spasms.

Except the semiprozine vote: there I am voting for Sci Phi Magazine. I am puzzled that Vox Day did not recommend it, and he has not publicly said why. Hmph.

Less than two weeks to vote remain, so if you’re already registered, do not fail, please, to send in your ballot.

Hugo 2016 Rabid Puppies ballot (MidAmericaCon2 )

BEST NOVEL
Uprooted by Naomi Novik (Del Rey)
Seveneves: A Novel by Neal Stephenson (William Morrow)
The Cinder Spires: The Aeronaut’s Windlass by Jim Butcher (Roc)
No Award

BEST NOVELLA
Penric’s Demon by Lois McMaster Bujold (Spectrum)
Perfect State by Brandon Sanderson (Dragonsteel Entertainment)
Slow Bullets by Alastair Reynolds (Tachyon)
Binti by Nnedi Okorafor (Tor.com)
The Builders by Daniel Polansky (Tor.com)

BEST NOVELETTE
“Obits” by Stephen King (The Bazaar of Bad Dreams, Scribner)
“What Price Humanity?” by David VanDyke (There Will Be War Volume X, Castalia House)
“Flashpoint: Titan” by Cheah Kai Wai (There Will Be War Volume X, Castalia House)
“Folding Beijing” by Hao Jingfang, trans. Ken Liu (Uncanny Magazine, Jan-Feb 2015)
No Award

BEST SHORT STORY
“Space Raptor Butt Invasion” by Chuck Tingle (Amazon Digital Services)
“Seven Kill Tiger” by Charles Shao (There Will Be War Volume X, Castalia House)
“If You Were an Award, My Love” by Juan Tabo and S. Harris (voxday.blogspot.com, Jun 2015)
“Asymmetrical Warfare” by S. R. Algernon (Nature, Mar 2015)
“Cat Pictures Please” by Naomi Kritzer (Clarkesworld, January 2015)

BEST RELATED WORK (2080 ballots)
Between Light and Shadow: An Exploration of the Fiction of Gene Wolfe, 1951 to 1986 by Marc Aramini (Castalia House)
“The Story of Moira Greyland” by Moira Greyland (askthebigot.com)
“Safe Space as Rape Room” by Daniel Eness (castaliahouse.com)
“The First Draft of My Appendix N Book” by Jeffro Johnson (jeffro.wordpress.com)
SJWs Always Lie: Taking Down the Thought Police by Vox Day (Castalia House)

BEST GRAPHIC STORY
The Sandman: Overture written by Neil Gaiman, art by J.H. Williams III (Vertigo)
No Award

BEST DRAMATIC PRESENTATION (LONG FORM)
The Martian screenplay by Drew Goddard, directed by Ridley Scott (Scott Free Productions; Kinberg Genre; TSG Entertainment; 20th Century Fox)
Avengers: Age of Ultron written and directed by Joss Whedon (Marvel Studios; Walt Disney Studios Motion Pictures)
Ex Machina written and directed by Alex Garland (Film4; DNA Films; Universal Pictures)
Mad Max: Fury Road written by George Miller, Brendan McCarthy, and Nico Lathouris, directed by George Miller (Village Roadshow Pictures; Kennedy Miller Mitchell; RatPac-Dune Entertainment; Warner Bros. Pictures)
Star Wars: The Force Awakens written by Lawrence Kasdan, J. J. Abrams, and Michael Arndt, directed by J.J. Abrams (Lucasfilm Ltd.; Bad Robot Productions; Walt Disney Studios Motion Pictures)

BEST DRAMATIC PRESENTATION (SHORT FORM)
My Little Pony: Friendship Is Magic: “The Cutie Map” Parts 1 and 2 written by Scott Sonneborn, M.A. Larson, and Meghan McCarthy, directed by Jayson Thiessen and Jim Miller (DHX Media/Vancouver; Hasbro Studios)
Supernatural: “Just My Imagination” written by Jenny Klein, directed by Richard Speight Jr. (Kripke Enterprises; Wonderland Sound and Vision; Warner Bros. Television)
Grimm: “Headache” written by Jim Kouf and David Greenwalt, directed by Jim Kouf(Universal Television; GK Productions; Hazy Mills Productions; Open 4 Business Productions; NBCUniversal Television Distribution)
Jessica Jones: “AKA Smile” written by Scott Reynolds, Melissa Rosenberg, and Jamie King, directed by Michael Rymer (Marvel Television; ABC Studios; Tall Girls Productions;Netflix)
Doctor Who: “Heaven Sent” written by Steven Moffat, directed by Rachel Talalay (BBC Television)

BEST EDITOR – SHORT FORM
Jerry Pournelle
No Award

BEST EDITOR – LONG FORM
Vox Day
Toni Weisskopf
Jim Minz
No Award

BEST PROFESSIONAL ARTIST
Larry Elmore
Lars Braad Andersen
Michal Karcz
Larry Rostant
Abigail Larson

BEST SEMIPROZINE
(Vox Day has this as No Award. I am voting Sci Phi Magazine.)

BEST FANZINE
File 770 edited by Mike Glyer
Castalia House Blog edited by Jeffro Johnson
Tangent Online edited by Dave Truesdale
Superversive SF edited by Jason Rennie

BEST FANCAST
The Rageaholic, RazörFist
8-4 Play, Mark MacDonald, John Ricciardi, Hiroko Minamoto, and Justin Epperson
Cane and Rinse, Cane and Rinse
HelloGreedo, HelloGreedo
Tales to Terrify, Stephen Kilpatrick

BEST FAN WRITER
Jeffro Johnson
Morgan Holmes
Mike Glyer
Shamus Young
Douglas Ernst

BEST FAN ARTIST
Christian Quinot
Kukuruyo
disse86
Matthew Callahan
Steve Stiles

JOHN W. CAMPBELL AWARD FOR BEST NEW WRITER
Andy Weir *
Pierce Brown *
Sebastien de Castell *
Alyssa Wong *
Brian Niemeier

 

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