Klavan on the Democrat Traditions

It may be a violation of Internet manners to post the whole column, but this was too good not to share. Andrew Klavan from the Dailywire website:

Democrats are charging that Republicans have already made up their minds about Brett Kavanaugh accuser Christine Blasey Ford whereas they say they believe Ford and that Kavanaugh is clearly guilty.

Democrats say it is appalling and sexist that Republicans would not allow Ford to testify and that forcing her testify is appalling and sexist and she should not have to testify, which would be appalling and sexist, so she should be made to testify which would be appalling and sexist.

Democrats say it is despicable that the Republican Senators who will question Ford are all white men, so Republicans have appointed a woman to question her, which Democrats say is despicable.

Democrats say it is horrifying that Brett Kavanaugh is accused of exposing his penis to a woman when they were both in college. The Democrats say penises should only be exposed to little girls in elementary school restrooms by boys who are really girls. And have penises. Somehow.

Democrats say we must believe all women and that it’s horrible that Mrs. Kavanaugh would defend her husband and they don’t believe her. Some Republicans point out that the Democrats did not believe the women who accused Bill Clinton of various sex crimes including rape, but Democrats say that’s different because Bill Clinton was a Democrat in power at the time he was accused and so his accusers were not credible whereas Judge Kavanaugh is a conservative so the women who accuse him are credible and to prove it, they would even be willing to believe the women who accused Bill Clinton now that he is out of power and doesn’t matter anymore.

Democrats say Judge Kavanaugh is not entitled to the presumption of innocence because this is not a criminal trial but instead is a lynch mob-style panic which is not covered by the Constitution.

Democrats say they will continue to publicize unsubstantiated charges against Kavanaugh because they are defending long-standing Democratic traditions. Like hypocrisy and lying.