Note on the Cassady Perjury
Let us pay no attention to the planned assisted suicide of Ghislaine Maxwell nor the damning answering machine message showing the Biden crime family corruption. Our media masters have decreed a more important story now heaves its leviathan bulk roaring into view.
I am one of many devoted brain-slaves of the God-Emperor Trumprifficus the Supremanator, who is even more awesome than known before.
Now we find he can elongate his arms like a giant squid, smash through a bulletproof glass separator into the chauffeur’s cabin, and wrastle a physically fit and highly trained special agent into the motor vehicle legwell by by grasping his clavicle.
Truly he is the MAGA KING! All hail the King, baby!
Then, while seated in the rear of the eighteen foot long vehicle and tossing aside the nine other burly bodyguards of his security detail, Trumpisaurus Rex reached through the mailslot window between vehicle compartments, and depressed the accelerator to the metal, roaring away down Pennsylvania Avenue like Speed Racer chasing James Bond in the Black Beauty.
Once in the cockpit, he engaged the warpdrive at Mach Ten, did doughnuts and Immelmann turns on the White House Lawn, shaking the pursuit from the presidential motor-cavalcade, zoom-zowerrifically barreling back to the capitol building at ultrasonic overthruster speed, all the while shouting “THIS IS MAGA COUNTRY!”
Sheriff Rosco P Coltrane reports that while in hot pursuit, when the president’s armored vehicle leaped the Rappahannock, playing Dixie on its horn, the sheriff, attempting to follow, ditched his car in the muddy bank, and sat comically on his sinking bumper, soggy hat dripping, spitting water from his pouty mouth.
Trump then ran over Congresswenchling Sandy Cortez, killing her for the third time that day, while dragging Jussie Smollett behind him, tied to the bumper by a hangman’s noose. Mr. Smollet, fortunately, did not loose control of the Subway sandwich tuna salad footlong he was clutching.
Solemn perjury, given under oath, has established that Trump can do nine impossible things before breakfast, and twice on Saturdays. It is for this reason that we now know Trump is none other than the extraterrestrial superhero ULTRAMAGAMAN the SUPERKING.
It is a good thing these facts are only known by a third hand report from a second hand source from hearsay evidence in a “hearing” that is neither oversight nor legislative investigation, hence which has no jurisdiction, nor lawful province, nor constitutional authorization, and operates one-sidedly without nor habeas corpus, nor cross examination, nor confrontation of witnesses.
Otherwise skeptics might doubt the ability of Ultramagaman to do the impossible.
Strange that his loyal followers could only retain control of the building for three hours, since we were all super heavily over-armed in full-kit six-inch Space Force ultamaga-battlearmor with mounted autocannons, flamethrowers, and radioactive chainsaws.
This is all on the unedited and unfalsified tape from security cameras released to the public, of course, showing each and every one of the tens and hundreds of thousands of innocent nuns and big-eyed schoolgirls machine-gunned and barbwire-garroted to death by fanatical Trump supporter stormtrooper death-assassins.
We need not note that one and only one person died that day, Ashli Babbitt, female veteran, shot down from behind without warning, while threatening no one. Peaceful protests that include looting and church-burning is allowed by the constitution, whereas being waved into a public building to take selfies with the police is insurrection, justifying cops firing randomly into the crowd without warning.
Keeping those tapes hidden would tempt an unduly and unfairly skeptical man to think this was the kind of lie told by a four year old that takes only four seconds to debunk.
Besides, even if Trump did grab the wheel of a car, or the clavicle of a security detail, what federal crime is involved? How is this a matter for congress? Simple assault would be a common law crime handled by the DC police.
ADDED LATER:
Some nevertrumpers are cawing online that we Trumpdolaters wrongly suppose Trump was in the Presidential limo called “The Beast” rather than an SUV, except that the witness explicitly called it that, as did the headlines from the nevertrumpers.
Dan Bongino, a former Secret Service agent, in his podcast explains that Tony Ornato, whom Cassady claims told her this story, could not possibly have told her this story, because no one in the Secret Service calls the limo “The Beast.” This is entirely a media invention to sound in-the-know, he says. No one actually in-the-know calls it that, ever.
Here’s the video. Skip to 5:30.
Meanwhile, Ghislaine Maxwell is placed on suicide watch, we are witnessing a Biden-orchestrated collapse of the Southern Border, Joe Biden’s corrupt deals with China are being exposed, World War III is looming, we are officially in a Biden-orchestrated Depression, we are in an Biden-orchestrated energy crisis, and the Dems have begun another season of arson and riot without the slightest fear of law enforcement, who encourage the unrest.
About John C Wright
John C. Wright is a practicing philosopher, a retired attorney, newspaperman, and newspaper editor, and a published author of science fiction. Once a Houyhnhnm, he was expelled from the august ranks of purely rational beings when he fell in love; but retains an honorary title.
